Posted by: thefitacademic | May 5, 2011

Missing out

This semester has just been insane! It started off busy and just got crazier and crazier as time went on. I thought I could not possibly fit one more thing onto my plate….and then more stuff would just dump into my lap from the heavens above boss man and somehow, someway, I managed to keep it together and make it work.

In the process, though, I feel like I’ve been missing out….on life, in general.

Remember when I used to do monthly goals? (like here and here)?

Well, those have totally fallen to the wayside. Who has time for goals when you’re struggling just to get by, ya know?

And I’ve had a little storm cloud brewing inside of me for some time now. I feel resentful when I see friends’ facebook status updates about lounging by the pool or going out with friends. Same thing when I’m driving to work and I see people walking with friends, wrapped up in conversation, and all the undergrads on campus who migrate to the bars for happy hour by 3 or 4. I don’t like it. I don’t want to be stormy inside. I want to feel sunshine! I want to feel free!

It’s hard to be sunny and free when you have no life, though. Mine has very much revolved around school for far too long. I’m totally okay with busting out an 80-90 hour work-week once in awhile, but I can’t do it on a consistent basis (I know some people can) – it’s just not healthy for me…physically OR mentally!!!

So I’ve decided I need to get back to the basics in life.

For me, one of those things includes making goals for myself. So, here are my Summer Goals

1. Get back into a regular workout routine. This should be easy enough because I’m supposed to be training for that triathlon, remember!? But I skipped almost all of my workouts last week, and this week I’ve been forced indoors due to allergies. Once school is out, I’ll seriously focus more on training. I already feel like I’m in good shape for the sprint tri, but I need to do more bricks & if I’m forced inside due to allergies, I need to be hitting up the gym, rather than just doing workout videos that serve no purpose in terms of training.

2. Make new friends. This one is HARD! Since I moved here solely for school, the only people I know are school people! Thank God for them because without them I’d have no one, but I really think its best for me to have non-school friends, too – just to be able to further separate myself mentally from school & work. But how does a grown up meet people outside of work & school? It never seemed like a problem when I was younger, but the older I get the harder it seems to be to meet people! I think I’m going to call my old friend “Jamie” up to start going to yoga together, and maybe I’ll join a running meet-up group. Does anyone have other suggestions???

3. Focus more on me. You’ve seen this goal before! But I need to bring it back to the table. How easy it is to just neglect ourselves when things get crazy! I’m in serious need of a mani/pedi and a massage. Plus, in general, I want to have more time to pursue my interests (like scrapbooking, playing guitar, cooking, gardening, etc.)

4. Find a better balance in life. I guess this pretty much encompasses all of my other goals. The point is NOT to just ignore school/work. It has it’s place. The point is to make everything more balanced. I want me time. I want husband time. I want friend time. Workout time. Rocky time. Relaxation time. Etc. etc. etc. I need to do some soul-searching to really figure out what an appropriate balance will be for me. Something that I can maintain and be happy with long-term. This has always been a struggle for me & it’s time I do something about it!

In an effort to start off on the right foot, I decided to make some cookies last night on a whim. No special occasion – I just felt like baking (I’ve always preferred baking over cooking, but I rarely do it because I have to cook in order to eat, whereas baking is kind of a luxury in terms of time. And time is a precious commodity!)

So, I whipped out the ingredients & got going on my famous snickerdoodles! I tweaked my normal recipe just a bit, adding a little orange juice (squeezed straight from an orange – not the bottled kind!) and a dash of pumpkin pie spice – just to give a hint of something that makes people go, “hmmmm, what is that?!”IMAG0638IMAG0639

I love my giant mixing bowl!

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The outcome….was PHENOMENAL (if I do say so, myself!) I must do these again soon! I wish I had made a larger batch!!!

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Heaven!

And now, I’m back off to work and school. 7 more days (but who’s counting?Winking smile)

Have you ever had a hard time making friends? Where do you meet people?

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Responses

  1. Ugh. YES. We moved here because my hubby is in the military and we had no choice and I’m still having a tough time branching out and making new friends. It’s just that I hate the beginning part of a friendship…where you have to explain your whole life and who you are and the other person doesn’t quite fully get you yet, like your friends who have known you for your whole life.

    • i know, for real! The beginning is always a little awkward/weird

  2. Oh yes. I know just what you mean. I’m very quiet so it can be hard for me to reach out to people and make new friends. It’ll happen though! Maybe try joining a group with similar interests? An exercise class perhaps?

    Those orange-y snickerdoodles sound fantastic, by the way.

  3. heather (then heather said) did a really great series a while ago called “the lonely files” where she talked about moving and making new friends. she gives a lot of great tips!

    • thanks – I’ll have to check that out!!

  4. I am really sorry that you have felt like you are missing out. Busyness comes and goes and you are such a hard worker, it will pay off!
    Great goals 🙂

  5. I find it hard but I force myself out there…You don’t realize until you move how comfortable your former life was with friends and family. I found the first year tough but started meeting friends slowly through my kids sports and schools. Also I find from joing activities and taking on a hobby helped 🙂

    It sounds like you are one busy woman! I hope things slow down for you and you have more time to focus on some you time. Seven more days and counting for you…

  6. I was so glad I noticed your blog name in someone’s comment section! I am currently working on my PhD in Rhetoric and Composition (English). So, I think we have a lot in common. Glad to find another academic!

    • thanks for stopping by! Yeah – it can be crazy!!!

  7. i love that bowl you were using to make those famous cookies of yours. i remember you made them for me in college..it was the first time i had ever had them! i thought they were made with snickers bars LOL… 🙂

  8. maybe this is a sign to find that balance. I think you are so wise! Find a workout buddy, run a 5k, volunteer somewhere. ALl great ways to enjoy sunshine!

  9. The end is in sight!! I have a hard time meeting people too!

  10. Hey thanks for finding my blog! I think you’re the first commenter I’ve had that doesn’t know me personally! Then again, I’ve just started commenting on other blogs and not lurking like usual.

    Two words for you regarding finding friends: Social Dancing.
    I know it sounds intimidating if you’re not a dancer, but I met tons of friends through a swing dancing club in university. Swing or salsa or ballroom (I’m partial to lindyhop, a kind of swing dancing), there’s usually a club on campus wherever you are, and they usually do a drop-in lesson for beginners at the beginning of an evening’s dance, where everyone is awkward and new and wanting to meet people. Volunteering for door shifts kept admission costs down and I got to meet everyone. It was a great experience that I wouldn’t trade for anything. I don’t even dance anymore but I have kept the friendships.

    • great idea! I’ll have to look into that!

  11. I know exactly how you feel, I hate the end of the semester! I also hate seeing all my friends FB statuses about how they’re not doing anything, it makes me so mad.

  12. […] after just complaining that I have been missing out, I’m already making headway on a couple of my goals (friends + me time). Friday night was […]

  13. […] Plus, look at me – already working toward my summer goals! […]


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